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eighteen elf-blooded mage shapeshifter apostate
eighteen elf-blooded mage shapeshifter apostate[attr="class","ffs-main"]
FRIENDS You won’t find Kieran within any of Thedas’s more “civilised” cities. He has no use for silks or frilly cakes. No desire to keep the company of banns or ladies, empresses or kings. And sees no safety in armed guardsmen or barred gates. Leave him to the heavily shadowed and forgotten corners of the world. The abandoned battlegrounds. The ruined fortresses. The haunted forests. And the folk who so fittingly wear the title of “undesirables.” Even then, Kieran might just shun them too.
His confidence is quiet but resolute, uncompromising. Kieran acts as if he’s the smartest man within the room because he knows that it’s true. He doesn’t need your flattery or your approval. He doesn’t need you to see him as a Champion for good, a saviour. Worse, he doesn’t want the scraps of valour fed to him from having been associated with heroes like the Inquisitor, for being the son of a hero. Kieran isn’t a hero. He only does what is right. What is needed.
Maybe you’re the same. That you’re not so quick to swallow the spoon-fed bullshit about the world always being in need of just one more hero, a champion of justice, a divine herald. That you’re quicker to listen than you are to speak. That you think instead of only acting upon what you feel. If you’re such a person then, maybe, Kieran will like you. Maybe.
ENEMIES He’s an apostate and neither an elf nor a human but perpetually caught within the uncomfortable space in-between, that alone should summarize how desirable others might find Kieran to be. Then there are his parents – Kieran wouldn’t be the first son to have inherited the foes of his father. And both Morrigan and the Hero of Ferelden each have their own fair share of enemies. Kieran isn’t frightened. The idea of someone seeking to do harm to another by deliberately attacking their associate, their child, is quite sad. Pathetic, even. Then again, he’s arguably safe from suffering the rage, the hatred, of those victimized by the Fifth Blight and the archdemon that had then raged. No-one sane would ever acknowledge Kieran’s responsibility for that disaster.
Kieran has secrets. Secrets that make him forever cynical, ever guarded. Secrets of a nature too unnatural and strange to ever be taken seriously but which he must guard regardless, less he finds himself locked up “for the greater good” or staring down the point of a sword. Secrets that he’s guarded long enough that he never learnt how to have patience for others. If you manage to leave from his company with no greater insult than having the level of your intelligence questioned, then that was Kieran being “nice.”
ROMANCE It’s not important. At least, that is what Kieran likes to tell himself. Look at his parents – their feelings for one another were warm but never enamoured, and, yet, together they still created life, worked to bring forth magic. They had him. And both continue on living their separate lives. Happy, in different ways. Kieran knows that he needn’t have to lean upon another to remain strong. To consider his life complete. Yet, experience has shown him that the intimacy of another does sooth the ache of loneliness. At one point there had been a girl, with hair both long and almost impossibly pale, the envy of any princess. Another had followed her, an elven lass who had been insufferably fierce but whenever she had laughed Kieran had found it impossible not to join in, even after yet another argument shared together. And then a boy, rather a man, for he had been much older than Kieran. Maybe they’ll be others. Maybe.
At times, Kieran does wonder if the path that he has chosen to follow in life would be easier if he had someone to walk it with. Someone who he could show glimpses of the beauty that he has seen with enchanted eyes. To murmur secrets to of lost lore no longer left forgotten. To laugh with. To engage in all the small meaningless things that he so readily dismisses on most occasions. He wonders. But the guilt is never far away.
It would be wrong to allow another to tread blindly down the path that he has undertaken. It is a path that even he himself does not walk lightly. What lies at the end, Kieran would not wish upon his enemies, much less someone whom he might love. After all, it was a mistake he already made once before, unwittingly forcing his own mother to pay a hefty price. That memory alone is enough for Kieran to know that it is better that he remains alone.
His confidence is quiet but resolute, uncompromising. Kieran acts as if he’s the smartest man within the room because he knows that it’s true. He doesn’t need your flattery or your approval. He doesn’t need you to see him as a Champion for good, a saviour. Worse, he doesn’t want the scraps of valour fed to him from having been associated with heroes like the Inquisitor, for being the son of a hero. Kieran isn’t a hero. He only does what is right. What is needed.
Maybe you’re the same. That you’re not so quick to swallow the spoon-fed bullshit about the world always being in need of just one more hero, a champion of justice, a divine herald. That you’re quicker to listen than you are to speak. That you think instead of only acting upon what you feel. If you’re such a person then, maybe, Kieran will like you. Maybe.
ENEMIES He’s an apostate and neither an elf nor a human but perpetually caught within the uncomfortable space in-between, that alone should summarize how desirable others might find Kieran to be. Then there are his parents – Kieran wouldn’t be the first son to have inherited the foes of his father. And both Morrigan and the Hero of Ferelden each have their own fair share of enemies. Kieran isn’t frightened. The idea of someone seeking to do harm to another by deliberately attacking their associate, their child, is quite sad. Pathetic, even. Then again, he’s arguably safe from suffering the rage, the hatred, of those victimized by the Fifth Blight and the archdemon that had then raged. No-one sane would ever acknowledge Kieran’s responsibility for that disaster.
Kieran has secrets. Secrets that make him forever cynical, ever guarded. Secrets of a nature too unnatural and strange to ever be taken seriously but which he must guard regardless, less he finds himself locked up “for the greater good” or staring down the point of a sword. Secrets that he’s guarded long enough that he never learnt how to have patience for others. If you manage to leave from his company with no greater insult than having the level of your intelligence questioned, then that was Kieran being “nice.”
ROMANCE It’s not important. At least, that is what Kieran likes to tell himself. Look at his parents – their feelings for one another were warm but never enamoured, and, yet, together they still created life, worked to bring forth magic. They had him. And both continue on living their separate lives. Happy, in different ways. Kieran knows that he needn’t have to lean upon another to remain strong. To consider his life complete. Yet, experience has shown him that the intimacy of another does sooth the ache of loneliness. At one point there had been a girl, with hair both long and almost impossibly pale, the envy of any princess. Another had followed her, an elven lass who had been insufferably fierce but whenever she had laughed Kieran had found it impossible not to join in, even after yet another argument shared together. And then a boy, rather a man, for he had been much older than Kieran. Maybe they’ll be others. Maybe.
At times, Kieran does wonder if the path that he has chosen to follow in life would be easier if he had someone to walk it with. Someone who he could show glimpses of the beauty that he has seen with enchanted eyes. To murmur secrets to of lost lore no longer left forgotten. To laugh with. To engage in all the small meaningless things that he so readily dismisses on most occasions. He wonders. But the guilt is never far away.
It would be wrong to allow another to tread blindly down the path that he has undertaken. It is a path that even he himself does not walk lightly. What lies at the end, Kieran would not wish upon his enemies, much less someone whom he might love. After all, it was a mistake he already made once before, unwittingly forcing his own mother to pay a hefty price. That memory alone is enough for Kieran to know that it is better that he remains alone.
